Archive for December, 2008

The night after my baby was stillborn was the first time I felt Jesus hug me. It is now 5 years later and as I relive the tragic day in my mind, I know now that Jesus hugged me with all of His love.

As a parent of an angel, I do not want to forget one detail of Tanner’s existence or death. He is a very special little boy who has brought many good things into my life BECAUSE of his passing. Looking back at the night after he was born dead, I know that Jesus was responsible for me to have the most wonderful and peaceful sleep in over 8 months.

Tanner was stillborn in the late afternoon on Sunday and I was then placed into a room on another floor, away from all of the happy new mothers. It was a ghost town with minimal staff and patients.

I told everyone, including my husband to go home. I wanted to be alone, rest and think about what was really happening. I had no wires, no tubes or anything hooked up to me, so there was no reason I would have to be disturbed by nurses in the middle of the night. My room was quiet and my sleep was heavenly and silent.

The lyrics to “Silent Night”

Silent night, holy night
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon Virgin Mother and Child
Holy Infant so tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly peace

This is how I truly felt. All was calm in my heart and all was bright for my sweet child entering into his home with Jesus. The warmth and comfort could have only come from Jesus, my Savior.

I miss you baby Tanner and Mommy loves you always

Peace Love and Hugs from Above

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Haven of Hope and Healing, Inc. held their Annual Memory Tree Ceremony in Historic Providence Christian Church, December 2, at 7pm. This tiny but incredibly quaint church is the perfect setting  honoring children who never had the chance or for a brief moment, looked into the eyes of their parents.


Darrell K. Moser and Christie Moser founded Haven of Hope and Healing and are dedicated to helping other bereaved families of pregnancy and infant loss. This is their 6th Annual Memory Tree Ceremony where families have an opportunity to honor angels by hanging an ornament while stating their child’s name and any other words reflecting undying love.


Haven of Hope and Healing was the support group my husband and I seeked out to help us after the loss of our stillborn son, Tanner Lee Williams.

I would encourage other bereaved families to participate in yearly events to honor their children and to share ways of coping  with other parents of similar losses. No one understands like a bereaved parent of pregnancy and infant loss.

This years Christmas ornaments were beautifully decorated and hand painted by Pat Scheible.


After the ornaments were hung by the families, the tree was then lit and an appropriate song played as we reflected on our children and the scripture read at the beginning of the program by Reverend Darryl Pebbles and Dr Steve Tucker.


Our angels matter and our always loved. Merry Christmas my sweet Tanner and I love you always.


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