I opened my eyes as wide as I could, trying to tell my husband through mental telepathy and expression to ask that bitch if there is a heartbeat. My own heart was beating so fast at this point and I was out of my mind or out of my body. “Surreal” is the best word to describe this horrific feeling.
Todd understood what I was suggesting to do. He asked the x-ray technician, “Is there a heartbeat?”……………………She just stared at the screen and without looking at us said, “No”. If I had any food in my stomach I would have thrown up everywhere. The room cleared out fast.
Moments later my girlfriend Evelyn walks in unaware of what is happening. Todd and I weren’t sobbing at this point because we were in absolute shock. The minute I told my girlfriend Tanner will not be born alive, she threw herself across my stomach and the 3 of us sobbed together. I don’t remember if the doctor came in at all during this. I don’t know if the x-ray technician pronounced Tanner dead or if she had the authority to. These recollections are somewhat fuzzy as was Tanner’s memorial service.
The first phone call was to my husband’s parents just minutes away. I do remember my in-laws being at our side shortly afterwards. I saw nothing but absolute gloom on their faces and I felt so sorry for them. I love them dearly and Tanner was there first grandchild. I am so sorry for him dying.
Peace Love and Hugs from Above www.justacloudaway.com
Diana
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The Birth of my Stillborn Baby- Part 3
