My husband and I could not believe Tanner’s heart wasn’t beating. When did he die? What do I do? Where do I go? Who am I supposed to talk to?
September 28, 2003 at 1am the contractions started. This was my husband’s birthday and apparent Tanner and Todd would share this special day, how wonderful. We have 3 dogs and I was worried about leaving them for a length of time, so I called my best friend Ev to dogsit. She arrived in a flash but didn’t understand what my intentions were for her. She was very excited to accompany us to the hospital, so I said what the hell. I would just send Todd back to look after the dogs if we were gone too long.
We were off to the hospital and I was on top of the world. Tanner would be in my arms in a few hours and everything was going to be perfect. I can even remember what I was wearing, polyester blue pants and a gray victoria’s secret t-shirt with sneakers. We registered or checked in prior to this day to make this part effortless. Within a few minutes we were led to a small examining room while Evelyn stayed in the waiting area.
This is the room where our lives would change forever. Flourescent lights and white sterile walls are what I remember. A heavy set nurse checked my cervix and then I was hooked up to a fetal monitor to record contractions. 2 nurses quickly turned into 4 nurses.
Peace Love and Hugs from Above www.justacloudaway.com
Diana
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The Birth of my Stillborn Baby- Part 1
I myself have suffered the death of a stillborn baby. My son had to be delivered on January 26 of 2009. He was due in April of 2009. I certainly feel the pain that you feel. please remember that your baby is in a far better place than he would be today. I am a christian woman and i believe in my lord Jesus. Condidering the times, I feel that the Lord kept my baby from the pain that is yet to come. He knew i always wanted an angel, and now i have one. I always say to myself, “some dream of angels, and I got to hold one!” Again, I am so so sorry for your loss. I will pray for you, and your beloved baby.
Hi there Margaret – I also lost my baby, a little girl who I named April. She was due in April and was born sleeping on 18th January 2009, so a similar time to your little boy. I just wanted to pass on my regards. I hope you are coping. It is a real struggle isn’t it day to day. Like you, my beliefs are extremely important to me and even more so now. It’s the only way to get through I find. I truly believe our babies are angels sent from above.
Diana – I am truly sorry too for your loss. I think these kits you have created sound wonderful. I don’t think we have them here in the UK but if we did, I’m sure I’d buy one.
I find as a nation we can be quite ‘stiff upper lip’ towards infant death. Many friends and family and work colleagues have shown tremendous support. Others just expect you to get back to normal – whatever normal is supposed to be when you have just lost your child.
Anyway, I just want to send big hugs to everyone and gentle days ahead.
Sam XX
[...] The Birth of My Stillborn Baby-Part 1 [...]
I LOST 4 MISCARRIED ANGELS. I WILL NEVER BE THE SAME. I AM STRONGER IN SOME WAYS, YET MY HEART IS NOT THE SAME. I LOVE THE LORD WITH ALL MY HEART TOO! ONE DAY WE WILL SEE OUR ANGEL BABIES AGAIN. BUT FOR NOW THEY SEE MOMMY CRY HARD WHEN I THINK ABOUT THEM. I DO EVERYDAY AND IM SO SO SORRY THEY DIDN’T MAKE IT. I HATE THAT IM OVER 40 AND THOUGHT I WOULD WIN FOR THEM. I HAVE 2 LIVING SONS WHO ARE MY ROCKS AND EVERYTIME I LOOK AT THEM I SEE MY 4 ANGELS TOO. GOD HOLD OUR BABIES FOR US. I LOVE THEM SO SO MUCH………….IM SORRY YOU LOST YOUR BABIES TOO……HUGGS LADIES WE ARE ALWAYS ANGLE BABIES MOMMIES!!!
OMG I NEVER THOUGHT ID SEE THE DAY I LOST A CHILD! NOW IT’S WRITTEN IN HISTORY! JUST NEVER THOUGHT IT BE ME…..ILL BET THAT IS THE BIG SHOCK FOR US LADIES….WE NEVER WOULD GUESS…..IT WOULD HAPPEN TO US! MORE SO THAT OUR CHILDREN WOULD DIE….BUT, IM SUPER MOM…..YOU HAVE TO LIVE….THE BIG SADNESS IS WE HAVE NO CHOICE AND WE COULDN’T SAVE THEM……GOD BLESS
I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD LOSE A CHILD EITHER,THIS WAS MY FIFTH CHILD,ALL FOUR BIRTHS WERE NORMAL AND FIGURED THIS ONE WOULD BE TO,ALTHOUGH I THOUGHT MAYBE THIS WOULD BE MY LITTLE GIRL,SINCE I HAVE FOUR BOYS… I WASN’T DUE TIL AUG 5 2010,BUT ON MARCH 6 WHEN I GOT UP I WAS BLEEDING,BY THE TIME WE GOT TO THE HOSP AND HOUR AND HALF LATER,RIGHT OUTSIDE THE ER MY WATER BROKE,I KNEW THAT WAS THE END,I WAS SO SCARED,MY BABY WAS BORN AN HOUR LATER,A LITTLE BOY,I DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A NAME PICKED OUT FOR HIM,HE WAS SO SMALL,A STILLBORN,I COULDN’T FIGURE OUT WHAT HAPPENED,THAT WAS THE SADDEST DAY OF MY LIFE,I BURIED HIM 2 DAYS LATER… I MISS MY BABY,I CRY EVERYDAY AND MY HEART ACHES SO BAD FOR HIM,I KNOW THAT HE’S IN A BETTER PLACE,BUT THAT DON’T STOP THE PAIN……GOD BLESS ALL YOU MOTHERS THAT HURT LIKE I DO….. I MISS YOU JOSHUA DAVID AND I LOVE YOU TO THE MOON……
i lost a baby 2nd aug 1992 ..yes he would have been 18 on monday , buying him his 1st pint instead this ….there special times which makes it harder ….but my heart goes out to everyone who loses a baby …i see myself has been lucky too has i did go and have 4 healthy children which are my life ……
some people are not has lucky…yes it hurt like made the one you lose but they will always be in your memory ……
[...] can also be acknowledged for bereaved parents of pregnancy loss. Miscarriages, stillbirths and babies who have passed of SIDS are very much-loved and [...]
http://m.youtube.com/user/gappsbroadcast#/watch?v=Pg7fp5-aPzk