Proud Father and Stillborn Son Share Birthdays
December 30, 2007 by diana gardner-williams
This is how our life turned out. My husband and my son Tanner will forever share a birthday on September 28th. The day started out incredibly exciting and ended with the birth of our first angel. I am so glad that I wrote this poem shortly after his birth because I don’t wish to forget one minute of Tannertime.
I hope that every family of an angel can remember the little details. Most are painful memories and can never be repeated because these moments belong only to them. They are special to us and to our angels. This is one poem that is placed in our family scrapbook.
SEPTEMBER 28, 2003
6 LONG MONTHS
2 PINK LINES
EXCITEMENT, JOY, GOOSEBUMPS
JUNGLE NURSERY
1ST KICKS-MAY 29, 2003
BABY SHOWERS
CONTRACTIONS
TODD’S BIRTHDAY PRESENT
TAKE A SHOWER
CALL DOCTOR
EXCITEMENT, JOY, GOOSEBUMPS
WAITING ROOM
SMALL EXAMINING ROOM
BRIGHT, WHITE FLUORESCENT LIGHTS
FETAL DOPPLER
SILENCE
TODD
OXYGEN MASK
3 NURSES
NO WORDS
SONOGRAM
EXPRESSIONLESS
TODD ASKS
NO, NO, NO
TODD AND I, EV, PARENTS, CARRIE AND RON
NO, NO, NO
SWALLOW HEART
WHISPER, “GOD IS GOOD”
WHITE ROSE ON DOOR
12 HOURS
NURSE TRACY
BABY TANNER
SILENCE
TEARS, LOVE, EMPTINESS
BEAUTIFUL BABY BOY
OUR SON
5 POUNDS 4 OUNCES, 21 INCHES LONG
TANNER LEE WILLIAMS
Peace Love and Hugs from Above www.justacloudaway.com
Diana
I think of Tanner often, and every time I light a candle for those who have passed on, I light one for him. I heard someone say, right after he was born, ‘I’ve never known anyone in the world for such a brief period of time to touch so many people.’ It is so true.
You have a wonderful family, my dear, and my family is proud to know yours.
What a beautiful poem! It brought tears to my eyes and gave me chills! Thank you for sharing it.
hi my name is sharon and im 21.im so sorry for your loss,i went through the same thing the day after ye the 2nd of jan 2008 at 8:15pm,i will never forgrt it!!
i gave birth to my beautiful baby daughter Addison Beth who weighed 5p 2 oz,she was born a sleeping angel.
we were told a week before i gave birth that our angels heart had stopped beating,we will never ever forget that day,our whole world fell apart.
still trying to come to terms with it but i cant see it getting any easier,
how are ye coping?
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I lost my son at 27 in Beiruit and remember his birth as though it was yesterday , I thank god for the years we had with him , he was wonderful too good for this earth and may god give you more children to love and cherish, i suffered a miscarriage after Wes was born and thought that was hidiouse !!! I can’t imagine your grief even though I have my own.
thank you. Our daughter is going through a very similiar time right now. we are going to the funeral home today. Madelyn Lee was due May 2 and was born April 20 evening the day of their sons 2 year birthday party….same thing no heartbeat. I was looking for some ideas on how to help them. Our God is good and is ordaining and sifting each moment through HIS hands. Thankful for our faith.
Today is one of my days. It comes on without warning and leaves me without change. It was Feb 4 1994 everything changed that day. Our son Brenton Mckenly was born never to open his eyes never to cry never to grow. Just to say hello and good bye. Yes I said 1994 I think it was yesterday today, but know it was so many yesterdays ago . Most don’t think of him any longer but I do, my husband speeks of him, I touch his head stone often. I had another child after Brenton died she is 12 now and God sent her to me so I could love again, but she is not enough to keep the pain from breaking thru. 2, 9 week pregnancy losses in the past 5 years leaves me empty. I have so much, I can’t begin to tell you, April is 28 next mo. she is married and beautiful is taking about starting her family, she is a 1 grade teacher, Sadie is 25 a emt now back in college great with horses and a beautiful women, Jantzen is 21 in college living on his own this year happy great girl friend, going far in live and is so handsom…Katherine is 16 a jr. in high school sings like wow, long dark auburn hair lots of friends and a really messy room, my sweet Addily is now 12 in the 6 th grade and is so cool, she swims and has all a’s and loves to see nature and save the earth, raising a 1 week old duck in her room, saved from a cats mouth. What is wrong with me I have no reason to stop in my tracks today and miss my son, wonder about what he would be like, who he might be today at 14 years old. Why is he not here I have 5 should I not miss him, think of him and love him everyday, no God sent him to me for a liftime even is his lifetime was to be brife. I love you all, all 8 of you equal but Brent I miss you the most of all. I pray every night for God to keep my family warm and safe and in his loving grace and I know is keeps you my son. Love Mom
I just read your page and It touched me deeply. I have just lost two nieces this week and knowing that my family and I are not alone it means a lot….
April 22nd , 2008,
I knew something was wrong when I heard my phone rang. It was my mom. She told me that My brother has taken my sister in law to the ER. The doctors said that they needed to intervene right away and do a c-section. She has just turned seven months this week. From the beginning of the pregnancy, my brother and sister in law decided to continue with the pregnancy against all odds. The devastated diagnosis of having conjoined twins was something too heavy for a family to bear. However, hope was the last thing we were going to give up.
Now, the time has arrived and my two little nieces were ready to come into this world. Ana and Maria Ledesma were born alive : ) and lived for less than an hour. Now, they had gone to a better place to be together for eternity. They rest peacefully in the arms of the one who decided to take them home.
Luis
Luis,
I jsut read your story. Ana and Maria Ledesma and your family will be in my prayers. I wish you all the power from God to move thru all this pain and I pray you will all be able to find beautiful moments warm memorys and hope very soon., Gods blessings lori
I am working in Brenton Garden this afternoon I will ask for a special blessing for your girls.
I lost my precious baby boy on February 28th. My husband and I were celebrating our 7th wedding anniversary a day early and went out for a nice dinner. We came home early and went to bed early. I woke up at 3:15am with stomach cramps and felt that I needed to use the bathroom. I can still remember the feeling, the gush, of my water breaking and screaming for my husband to wake up. It’s too soon, this can’t be happening. I can’t lose my baby! I was 21 weeks pregnant with hopes and dreams for my precious child. I spent our anniversary in the hospital praying that I didn’t go into labor. I was allowed to come home to be on bedrest after 48 hours. I made it through 2 days being at home before I started running a fever. I went to the hospital like I was told where she said my fever was down and that I could go home because my contractions were subsiding…..stunned, I say…I didn’t know I was having contractions. I don’t feel them. I go home and sleep through the night only to wake with more intense contractions that I can definately feel now. I delivered a tiny angel at 11:32 on Feb 28. It’s been almost 3 months and I haven’t made it through a single day without breaking down and asking God why?!?! I’m not strong enough to make it through life without my son. I wasn’t ready to get out of bed and move on with my life. I still want to lie in bed all day and hold onto his things. For any woman that has lost a child, whether it be 4 weeks, 20 weeks, or 40 weeks I am so sorry. It doesn’t matter how long you have been pregnant, it doesn’t hurt any less to lose a child. I’m fortunate that I was able to hold my sweet angel after God took him. I will never forget that horrible day and will never look at my wedding anniversary quite the same.